I go to great lengths to not watch the news. And by great lengths, I mean that when Doug turns it on I cover my ears and shout “No! No! No! There are unpleasant noises emanating from the T.V. again!” and shut myself into the study to stare at the walls and contemplate my own mortality.

But I do check Weather.com. Mostly because I have a tendency to plan outdoorsy vacations in the middle of winter on the off chance that there will randomly be nice weather and then monitor the forecast like a helicopter mom.

But guess what they sneak onto the margins of weather.com?

News.

But not just any news.

The most horrific news. (Or maybe it’s not any more horrific than regular news. I wouldn’t know).

But I do know that whoever has the job of picking out news stories for Weather.com is a sad, twisted sadist.

I always e-mail myself the headlines of the worst stories I see there, probably because I’m building a case for when I eventually sue for emotional damages.

Record Death and Destruction

This is what I saw posted front and center last month right after I heard there was a tornado in San Francisco and was worried my sister was dead. This headline/collection of photographs turned out to actually be about a storm that happened years ago. Not cool, Weather.com.

WATCH! Russian Killed in Deadly Zorb Ride

This was posted as a video. Because that’s exactly what I want along with the morning forecast. To watch a video of someone being killed before my eyes.

Woman Gored by Rhino Seconds After Taking This Photo on Safari!

            Accompanied by photo of woman happily posing in front of said rhino. Sheesh.

Couple Killed on Around the World Trip

            Starting to think aforementioned sadist gets off on young people dying on vacation. Which is exactly what I like to think about when checking the weather for my upcoming getaways.

Is the End of the World Near? Doomsday Scenarios Played Out

Included multiple videos simulating possible ways the world could end and kill us all including, but not limited to: Slow Motion Global Disaster, No Warning of Disaster, Deadly Gamma Ray, and A Killer Burst of Radiation.

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Image from (dreamstime)